| "I REPORT YOU DECIDE" |
The Homer Report
3/25/09
Through my travels, I could write about some of the encounters I've had along the way.
From the hills of Kentucky, through the Midwest to New York, New Hampshire (Boston
area), Florida (South Florida area) and everywhere in between. With all the many of good
people I've ran across, I must add that I've also seen many a squirrel and met one
porcupine along the way. Instead of writing, I have an excerpt that may be a little easier
to comprehend. Below is the excerpt from the book Country Days and Southern Ways.
The Southern Dialect
From the hills of Kentucky, through the Midwest to New York, New Hampshire (Boston
area), Florida (South Florida area) and everywhere in between. With all the many of good
people I've ran across, I must add that I've also seen many a squirrel and met one
porcupine along the way. Instead of writing, I have an excerpt that may be a little easier
to comprehend. Below is the excerpt from the book Country Days and Southern Ways.
The Southern Dialect
- The great migration of southerners to the north during the late 1940s and early '50s brought about a
vernacular clash between the two regions.
A visitor to the south from the north spoke a language that most southerners found befuddling. The
newcomer might be viewed with suspicion, but a southerner always maintained his dignity and refrained
from saying anything that wasn't in good taste. He simply stared at the foreigner with an intense look. Then it
was revealed why those northerners couldn't speak any better. When someone from the south visited
acquaintances in the north, many yankees were downright rude. After staring and pointing, they'd walk over,
get you to talking, and then belly laugh until tears come. As laughter subsided, they'd try to get you to speak
some more.
Now, the southerner has been laughed at, ridiculed and falsely accused of being dimwitted because he was
(and still is) slow of speech. To tell the truth, Southerners were placed into existence before the rest of the
world was ready for them. Why, we have had the ability to place three and sometimes four words into one
pronounceable and understandable garble, which speeded up word processing by the brain and enable us
to speak at a slower rate.
| Tips for the Road When traveling up and down the road, there are a few things you may want to keep in mind: A New Yorker feels he is a bit smarter and thinks he can do things just a little better than the rest of us. If you don't believe it -- just ask him. Keep in mind you can use their way of thinking to your advantage. If you plan to stop in Salem, New Hampshire just remember...this town is close enough to Boston that most considered it to be part of the Boston area. These folks are die hard sports fans - Red Sox and Celtics. You definitely want to keep in mind; when it's baseball season, if you're not a Red Sox fan, it would be wise to keep your mouth shut or stay home till the game is over. Or you just may have to dust some dirt off your pants. Oh yeah, don't mention then name Pitino in the Boston area....everyone, and I mean everyone, will look at you, and not one will tell you how great he is. While in Florida you may have to brake for an 80 yr old driving 40mph on the Turnpike, or you may have to brake out of the way of a 120mph high-speed chase anywhere from Miami to racetrack road in Pompano. Also keep in mind, if you get pulled over (at 2am) and surrounded by 10 police cars for speeding (52 in a 35) down A1A in Ft Lauderdale, with an intoxicated hillbilly from Hazard, Ky riding in the back seat that won't shut up....DON'T PANIC. The cop that looks at your license may be from Eastern Ky. With a Hazard hillbilly and a cop from East Ky...you could be lucky enough to get off with a little advice from the Ft Lauderdale Policeman---"You guys slow it down a bit. And be careful, you're not in Kentucky, you're in South Florida, what you pick up may not be what exactly you think it is." |