THE HOMER REPORT
"IIIIIII'M
WATCHING
YOU"
"If you're gonna sell Betty, what Betty buys, then you have to see it through Betty's eyes"
The Song and Dance
    The Puppet Master, Edgar the Weatherman and
    Uncle Bobby had a short meeting recently. All we
    can say is our informants are working DILIGENTLY.
    They are CONSUMED by this stuff too.

    As the meeting started, it is clear who the PUPPET
    MASTER is. He stands in front of Uncle Bobby and
    Edgar the Weatherman, with his unlit cigarette in his
    right hand and waving his hands around while he is
    speaking. This goes on for a while. Uncle Bobby and
    the Weatherman are both looking up at Joe, like first
    graders would look at Superman................. in AWE.

The Puppet Master:
    "Bill you are so good for the horseman. If you get
    them to agree and I will take care of you on this end.
    Matt's BarBQ sure sounds good doesn't it. I can't
    give you any of the Telephone Account Wagering.
    But, I can take two or three days off of your regular
    meet and you can use that money on the other days.
    We'll make it look like a purse increase. Sounds
    good.....doesn't it Bill? You owe it to your people Bill.
    They are your people. Remember...They pay you. Do
    what I tell you....And I will take care of you on this
    end."

Edgar the Weatherman:
    "Thank you Joe, I couldn't agree more. I am the best
    man for these horsemen. You know me Joe, I will do
    everything I can to get the BOARD to agree with your
    proposal. You should be really proud of me Joe.
    These guys really trust me. I think we need to keep
    this Telephone Account Wagering thing as quite
    as we can. We don't need any of that money, even if
    it does accounts for over 60% of the yearly
    handle. Anyway, if you need a starter for any
    reason, let me know, I want to start the races. I
    don't have a clue, but what the heck, it's only "the
    horsemen" and "the betting public". If I mess up, it
    won't cost me any money......you still pay the same
    even if I mess up, right? Will you pay for my Starter's
    license, Joe? Don't worry Joe....I'm your man.
    Just don't forget me! Include me! I'm your man!
    Remember that. Uncle Bobby is with us all the way
    Joe. I've got him right where I want him. Uncle
    Bobby, do you have any comments? What about
    Thunder Ridge and Bluegrass Downs? What the
    special at Matt's today?

Uncle Bobby:
    Thank you Joe, I agree with what you're saying.
    Whether it makes good sense or not, I agree with
    you. Also, Bill "I've said it once and I will say it again,
    and I stand behind what I say with NO
    APOLOGIES....'I'm not going to Bluegrass Downs.
    If I have to go to or race at Bluegrass Downs, I
    will quit my job as President and get out of the
    horse business'.
    The last time I said that, I said right in front of
    Bluegrass Downs General Manager. He knows how I
    feel about that place. They got my number..if they
    want something they can call me. Joe you know me, I
    will help you on that Telephone Account Wagering
    thing too. We don't want any of that money. 0% is
    fair enough. Bill agrees...that's why I like him so
    much. And besides.....It's not anyone's business
    what you do with the track's money. When I talk...
    people listen. Ain't that right, Bill. Let's throw a little
    bone out there to keep these guys quiet. That's my
    suggestion.

    Joe now lighting his cigarette..........continues to
    wave it around as he speaks. Uncle Bobby and Edgar
    the Weatherman are both really excited now.  
    Edgar the Weatherman got so excited, he tinkled in
    his pants.

The Puppet Master:
    "Good idea Uncle Bobby!!! We need a little diversion.
    So let's throw a bone out there in GOOD FAITH. In
    GOOD FAITH.....that is a good phrase. Bill, I want
    you to use that phrase alot.......it sounds good,
    'IN GOOD FAITH'. What ever you guys do, don't let
    them get into deep questioning about Telephone
    Account Wagering. I wouldn't want anyone to find
    about the two guys in "the room". I have to say, 'I
    don't know if they are betting through the system or
    the Telephone Account Wagering system. I just know
    they are high rollers. I said HIGH ROLLERS.
    Remember guys take care of me.....and I will take
    care of you. Get Bluegrass and the Ridge to do what
    I want and there will be a bonus for you.

The Puppet Master:
    "It's a good thing WE like EACH OTHER!!"

Uncle Bobby:
    "I AGREE!"

Edgar the Weatherman:
    "I AGREE!.......TOTALLY"

Mack of All Trades:
    "WAIT GUYS!!! DON'T FORGET ME!!! COUNT ME IN!!
    YES..YES...SIR...I AGREE...SIR.....I AGREE!!
10/5/07

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Uncle Bobby
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"Nobody"

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